Thank you so much for reading. And thank you for sharing your story. I’m so sorry you’re part of this awful club of suicide widows. Not really sure how else to describe it. I think this type of grief is complex and difficult. I wrote a story on here about my struggle with prenatal depression during my 3rd pregnancy. I touch on my husband’s suicide a bit in it. I think it definitely affected my mental health during it. It’s an event that follows us forever.

I do think counseling would be great, but that’s so much easier to suggest than to actually find and access. I find that I can vent and heal through writing. I hope you can find a way to let out all your thoughts and feelings.

And there’s nothing wrong with you. Sending a virtual hug.